The holidays are a time of good will, right? And by good will, I mean “forced interaction with people who can diametrically oppose your entire political, emotional and eco-minded philosophies and make you want to punch a hole through a wall.” And sure, your family may be great – but you can’t control the people they bring into the fold. Inevitably, there will be people who like to talk politics, religion, and other non-controversial subjects to the point that you’re ready to dive into the gravy, only to emerge by Valentine’s Day.

But you don’t have to swim around in giblets to escape controversy this holiday season. You can stay true to your bad green self by sticking to your issues! So here are some responses you can implement when two of this year’s most controversial green subjects come up.

And what might they be?

GLOBAL WARMING
Naysayers: Global Temperatures have risen and fallen many times before. Global warming and cooling are as natural as the rising and falling tides. There are computer models that predict our temperature is going down, not up!

Your response: There are computer model that will predict whatever you want! 2005 was the hottest year on record. 2030 is the year Glacier National Park will have no glaciers left, according to the U.S. Geological Survey predictions. And 400,000 square miles of Arctic sea ice (roughly the size of Texas) has melted in the last 30 years, threatening polar bear habitats and further accelerating global warming worldwide. This is according to the Arctic Climate Impact Assessment.

And then go like this:

CAP AND TRADE
Naysayers: America simply can’t afford any kind of cap-and-trade/carbon tax. It’s going to limit economic growth and freeze our economy. Besides, global warming is a myth.

Your response: By 2050, 2.5 billion people will be added to the planet. Most of them will want to live as people of the Western Civilization do – with homes, cars, and enough to eat. Who says? The United Nations. And just think about the energy, climate, water and pollution implications of adding another 2.5 billion mouths on the planet. But let’s keep our dependence on energy on a part of the world where people despise us and who will surely continue to raise the prices as sources dwindle. Or we can use the money generated by cap and trade tax to look for renewable energy alternatives that we can control.

Also, cap and trade, which relies on market incentives, is traditionally a conservative idea. Cap and trade is all about setting hard limits on total emissions. Then a regulated exchange of tradable permits gives enterprise a choice: Invest in efficiency and better technology – or buy credits from more efficient players, underwriting their cleaner practices.

And this too.

Polar Bear Photo Source
Panda Photo Source: Ajay77*/Flickr